The Rude Hamptons - Tales of People Behaving Badly In Long Island’s Summer Playground

I was exiting Lynch’s last weekend and I saw some folks following me out so I held the door. There was one woman with a small child making her way. She and child stopped on the threshold of the doorway, she proceeded to put a hat on her
child’s head, then walk out the door.

All the while I am holding the door, see…I got no thank you or any acknowledgment for this deed whatsoever.

Thought for sure I’d get at least a thank you out of her for making me wait.

- B

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No story here yet…need to interrogate the wait staff about Sunday 2 for 1 dinners.

My wife and I stopped there for dinner on Sunday night having never been before.

The twofer menu had a disclaimer that took up half the page. I could only sit and smile thinking there must be many many many wonderful stories behind something that looks like a car rental agreement.

The Editor

BTW - Excellent Meal

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A woman bellowing loud enough into her cell phone to be heard from the Cooper’s Beach overpriced hot dog stand all the way down to the lifeguard stand. This - the day before July 4th - today.

“No you SOB — I told you I was picking the kids up tonight for the birthday party! “That’s Bullcrap - yes she actually said bullcrap — not the saltier version of the word - maybe just trying to be polite with the hoards of children around her listening to her post-marital bloviating

She goes on and on on what a lowlife, bottom dwelling scum her ex husband is - screeching at the top of her lungs - actually bumps into and nearly knocks over someone else’s child on the way to the parking lot to continue her screech-fest (very considerate) ..and didn’t stop talking as she ignored the child she bumped.

Do people - especially Southamptonites - have a clue they can be overheard on their cell phone. Other overheard LOUD cell phone conversations on the beach — people discussing salaries - multimillion dollar confidential deals — talking trash about easily recognizable people. All thinking they are in the privacy of their home.

Astonished on Coopers….

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It’s a beautiful Saturday afternoon and I’m enjoying a brew after hanging out under my car all day and a lazy All Hamptons taxi driver has turned around in my driveway twice now and continues to drive by the neighbors house honking his horn looking for his fare!!

Why can’t this guy get out of the car and knock on the damn door?!

- B

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I went to Southampton Beach with my husband, my 2 children, my girlfriend, her 3 children and 4 other friends (twelve people in all). The beach was crowded that day so we looked for a spot just passed the life guard, but close enough to them. There was a women sitting further back on the beach. We started to set up our area closer to the water as we had 1 small child with us. The woman kept staring at me so I finally ask her why. She replies “Your blocking my view”. I didn’t know you can own a view on the beach.
- K

- Editor: What are the the proper beach rules? Normally if the tide goes out I move closer if I value ocean front seating.

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So I was driving West on County Road 39A in the middle of the “trade parade” rush hour at 5:00 PM. The traffic was bumper to bumper. As I was approaching a stoplight I noticed a red Dodge Viper anxiously wanting to merge into traffic from the Omni Health and Racquet Club parking lot. At the time I figured I was running late and I didn’t see the need to let him into traffic, considering I had the right of way anyway. So I passed by him without letting him in. Next thing I know, I see the same Dodge Viper screeching up beside me down the middle turning lane.

He rolls down his window and screams “YOU MOTHER F***ING WHORE!!!”.

Then he spits in my general direction (getting most of the spit on his own leather seats), and cuts me off, merging back into the barely moving traffic. I then get to follow his obnoxious ass through another half hour of bumper to bumper traffic. I can only imagine what this guy would have done if I actually did something wrong!

- Sue

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I work in a doctors office where we take walk in patients. Well let me tell you they walk in and I have a room full of patients and they want to know why they have to wait. They have to get to the beach or they come in at 4:45pm and we close at 5 and want to get care.

When you ask why they did not come in earlier they just say, “and give up a day at the beach?” Like my time to go home is not important.

That’s when I say, “Well I can’t give up driving one hour to Southampton for you to come back tomorrow.”

- R

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