The Rude Hamptons - Tales of People Behaving Badly In Long Island’s Summer Playground

I’m married to a local, who grew up in Springs. We live in Florida now and visit family about twice a year. Summers are exciting for me, torture for him. I drag him into the village all the time for some people watching.

One morning I decided to venture out on my own with my daughter in her stroller. We were hungry and walked up to the Golden Pear on Newtown. As I approached the door (and step) a man dressed in a white, all linen suit jumped in front of me, whipped open the door, and walked right in. Leaving the door to slam in my face.

Forgetting all decorum I yelled after him, “What the F***!??”

A local, had to be a local, noticed and shook his head and helped me through the door and even helped get the stroller up! I was so baffled…I felt like I was in another country…one where they ignore women!

- Jenny

I immediately thought of the Panama Jack guy when I read this story. - The Editor

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Walking down main street in East Hampton (don’t ask me why I was dumb enough to even be near the village after Memorial Day.)

I hear honking and then “Hey, HEY!”. I turn around and see a BMW, with it’s occupants waving at me like they’re on fire. I go over to see the emergency and get “What are you, deaf? How do we get to the Maidstone Club?”

After a second of shock I recovered and sent them to Maidstone Park, as far into Springs as possible. They whipped an illegal U Turn and off to Springs they went.

If you ask a local for directions and actually want to get there, ask them nicely.

- L

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My wife and I were walking to CittaNuova on Sunday night and spied a woman in an expense short dress and 4 inch stiletto heels carrying what seemed to be a bag of trash.

I bet my wife wife five dollars that she was going to throw that out in the trashcans at the Hampton Market Place aka Schmidt’s aka Chicken House.

Sure enough she dumps her small bag of trash and sashays back to her felony crib on Church Street.

- The Editor

PS - It is illegal to throw out your household garbage in town or private trash cans.

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